Kim Zapata

Kim Zapata

Bio

A “mommy blogger,” PPD survivor, distance runner, and Disney aficionado who likes sipping on microbrews and snuggling with her cat.

Kim Zapata Articles

Photo by Brian Erickson on Unsplash

I'm 35 Years Old And Can't Drive A Car

No other act is more symbolic of adulthood and one’s “coming of age,” but there are numerous reasons why I don’t drive.

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I am a mom — a mom with piercings and tattoos, bright pink hair and a half-shaven head. Image: ThinkStock.

No, My Tattoos And Piercings Do Not Make Me A "Bad Mom"

I have 14 body piercings, a rib tattoo, a thigh tattoo, an inner wrist tattoo, two “tramp stamps” (and, yes, both were acquired when I was 18), and a full sleeve. In fact, I have more tattoos than I can count, since most of my pieces meld right into the next. But you know what? My piercings don’t make me masochistic, a degenerate, or some sort of delinquent. My tattoos don’t make unemployable. And my body modifications definitely do not make me a “bad mom.”

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Most moms, and parents, have had moments like this — they have had thoughts which seem dark and awful, and which they’d rather not admit out loud. Image: Kim Zapata.

I Fantasized About 'Getting Sick' After My Baby Was Born

One thing I cannot forget was how much I wanted to “get sick.” How I longed to get some sort of ailment or bedridden condition. I cannot forget how I prayed to become ill.

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Photo by Naomi August on Unsplash

When You're A Mother Contemplating Suicide

Suicide is a complex issue, one which can be caused by numerous factors: i.e., mental health issues, physical health issues, familial issues, and financial issues. They can all put you “at risk.” The matter is a public health crisis. More than 800,000 people die by suicide each year. How do I know so much about suicide? Because I have considered suicide. Because I have contemplated suicide, and because I have attempted suicide.

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My daughter is about as sweet as they come. Image: Thinkstock.

My 2-Year-Old Is The Most Empathetic Person I Know

You see, every time we watch The Lion King — every freakin’ time Mufasa dies — her small fists ball up, her nose and brows furrow, and tears well up in her eyes. But instead of worrying about herself, she asks “Mommy, what happen? Dis sad?” She pauses and waits for my response, but when I let silence linger a moment too long, she asks again, “Dis sad, Mommy? Dis sad?”

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Since the rates of depression are twice as high in women as in men, this means there are many, many mothers out there who face this struggle everyday. Image: We Heart It.

Antidepressants Make Me A Better Mom

I'm calmer, more level-headed, and more responsive (not reactive). I'm able to make it through the day without every comment, incident or event causing me to spiral out of control. Oh, and I'm not crying, at least not every minute of everyday, because antidepressants allow me think clearer, feel better, and be better. Antidepressants make me a better mom.

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