The Secret to Non-Stop Sex: Why Monogamy and Marriage Don't Have to Destroy Lust

We've all heard it. (And lamented it.) Love lasts, lust doesn't.

We humans are tricky little beasts. On one hand we crave intimacy, security and monogamy – we're hard-wired to long for a dark cozy cave chock full of the familiar.

Why? Because it means we're safe. We ain't cold, we ain't hungry and we ain't starved for affection.

On the other hand, it's been proven that we also thrive on new experiences to turn our gears and make our panties wet (whether it's simply trying spicy lo mein for the first time or traveling to the bowels of Timbuktu.) Our brains love change.

The problem is, desire is synonymous with wanting something. And if you want something, that means you don't have it.

Hence the problem.

But psychologist and sex therapist Esther Perel just might have a solution—check out her TEDtalk on sustaining surpise while mating in captivity. You can thank us later while you bask in your post-coital marital bliss.

 

 
 
 

Photo courtesy of Thinkstock

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