Eliana Osborn

Eliana Osborn

Bio

Eliana Osborn is a writer and part-time English professor living with her family in Arizona. She spends too much time in the sun and will someday publish her novel in progress.

Eliana Osborn Articles

Noticing a bit of a theme here...

There's A Serious Diversity Problem In Higher Education

84% of full professors in America are White. In case you were unsure, that does not match the overall makeup of the country or the student body.

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Pictured: Numbers 5 and 6.

The Parts Of Parenting That Don't Suck

When I’m staring at the wall trying to keep my cool when my 6-year-old is hysterical about the tiny bump on his finger, I attempt to channel some of the good parts.

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Having to walk carefully to avoid wedgies? Not helping any of us be our best selves. Image: Thinkstock.

The Life-Changing Magic Of Buying The Correct Size

Size, like age and salary and whatever else, is just a number. Pretending numbers don’t measure things isn’t helpful. I’m 38 years old: That isn’t good or bad, but it IS different from being 18 or 50.

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Did you shower today? You've already started on one.

Here Are Some Realistic New Year's Resolutions

I wanted to write a book last summer. Then I realized what a terrible goal that was and modified accordingly.

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"I can't wait for Eliana's turn."

What 50/50 Parenting Looks Like At My House

We take weekend turns. He does vacations and summers. Literally. He takes them away. It is great.

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1:54 PM: Stephanie has the softest hands in the universe.

Massage Therapy: A Minute-By-Minute Account

Self-care is important. Massages are a good form of self-care. Too bad I keep thinking about what I'm going to make for dinner.

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The easiest pets of all.

How To Choose The Right Pet For Your Particular Level Of Laziness

If you kill a tortoise, even on accident, you probably shouldn’t have children.

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Enjoy the silence... And sleeping on the couch.

My Husband Bought Noise-Canceling Headphones...And I Have Feelings About It

I always have a small piece of my brain on mom mode, no matter what else is happening. I have no problem with this, since that is how humanity has survived.

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"I felt good."

Running Literally Saved My Life

...But not in the way you'd think.

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Kirk 4ever

Kirk Cameron Was My First

Kirk Cameron in all his Growing Pains glory was the ideal crush. Unthreatening, goofy, good kid with very reasonable weekly conflicts. And a good smile. Always been a sucker for that.

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