Eliana Osborn

Eighteen hours, even if prepared with reading and art material, snacks, and an upgrade to China Airline’s family couch seating, is still EIGHTEEN HOURS.

Best case scenario? A few hours of activity, then we all fall asleep comfortably. Worst case? Well, let's just say it involves blood splatter on those weird double-paned airplane window.

Really, you should thank me. I’m just protecting your future self.

I’m not broken by this therapy failure. Jane wasn't the person to help me at this point of my life. Someone else WILL be.

I’m not there yet. But I need to be honest—I’m closer to 40 than any other multiple of five.

My Life on the Road (or MLR) is not what I expected...the idea of not waiting for experience to come to you permeates the book.

84% of full professors in America are White. In case you were unsure, that does not match the overall makeup of the country or the student body.

Standardized tests are taking over the world. I can say this because it is true. Like a creeping vine that seems attractive and charming at first, tests appear to be reasonable for the data and direction they can provide.

The most important things my mother taught me included work from Neil Diamond, Billy Joel, Wham! and Whitney Houston.

You know how someone can give you a compliment that you know isn’t true? Like, they tell you a dress looks good when you are absolutely certain that is not the case? But if they keep saying it looks good, you start to think “Yeah... this looks good.”

My sister Liz is full of wisdom, like my favorite quote I’ve shared with practically everyone I know: “Every pair of underwear has two good sides.”