Kate Ryan

The birds abandon their posts in the pepper trees, sending tiny, oblong leaves raining to the ground.

He thought I was mad, but in an artistic way; I thought he was horny all the time, but in an artistic way.

Alison learned from her grandmother how a plastic smile could take you places—especially in a place like Hollywood.

He died a violent death. I saw him myself, flopping between wooden blades, his head bent back strangely.

One crawled up the side of the bag and opened her wings, a hardtop convertible with legs.

I have no choice but to start all over again, tomorrow or not at all.

12:48 AM. Why would someone schedule an exorcism for the middle of a weeknight?

I saw my old babysitter at a women’s wrestling cage match.

We’ve all been there. Your boyfriend has a raging boner, but you’re just not in the mood to do anything with it. But how do you tell him to tone that boner down and quick? No need to worry. Here are ten simple, foolproof ways to kill that boner in ten seconds—or less—while keeping your man’s ego rock-hard.

Fresh orange juice, milk, thick slices of ham, a block of cheese, a carton of eggs—her husband kept it this way should this moment arrive.