online dating

This article first appeared on SHE'SAID' and has been republished with permission.

I never thought I’d be the kind of person who’d ever admit they needed help. But I’d had my heart smashed into pieces, and my bad dating choices were making me depressed. For instance, I was dating this one guy, and, let’s just say, there were four other women who could have said the same thing about him.

When a Tinder lover ghosted me cold after a month, I fell into a deep depression. There was no accountability in the digital dating world, where you had zero real-world mutual friends to tie you together.

Mirror selfies – Men, if you must selfie (and I’m not recommending that you do) please do not selfie in a mirror. If you really must see what you look like the instant you take the photo, at least use your phone’s flipcam.

I’ve been doing the online dating thing for a little over a year now, and it’s the first time I’ve been doing it as a staunchly, outspoken, won’t-take-any-bullshit feminist. That’s how I discovered the curious system of “revenge flagging,” which is when guys don’t take rejection gracefully or can’t deal with a bruised ego — they flag the woman’s profile as revenge.

There's a dating site for everything. No, really. Everything.

Want to write the world's best OkCupid profile? Be honest, specific, smart and not-scary.

Finding a partner on the intrawebs is nothing to be ashamed about.