That feeling isn't your fault. It's the direct result of a process known as trauma bonding, and understanding this is a crucial step toward setting yourself free.

What Is Trauma Bonding?

The more you are aware of the process of trauma bonding, the more quickly you can identify and avoid falling into a narcissist's trap.

Not everyone is gonna fit in a zen box. (Image Credit: Thinkstock)

You Are Not Forgiven

Forgiveness is a virtue exalted in our culture, but I do not fit into any Zen portrait of clemency. I do not think fitting into said portrait should be a prerequisite for healing. The benefits of forgiveness are questionable. Forgiving one’s partner for indiscretions does not necessarily improve relationships.

He's a ghost to me. He's left fingerprints all over my body, mind, and soul. Image: Thinkstock.

I Still Love My Abusive Ex-Boyfriend

[CN: emotional abuse and gaslighting, description of sexual assault.] As a three-time survivor of intimate partner violence, I hate what he did to me, but I don't hate the person with whom I fell in love — not even a little bit. My love for him will always exist.