Kate Ryan

“You are the naked girl on horse, yes?” he said, approaching her table from across the café patio.

One of my biggest fears is having a random stranger ask me, "how it’s going?" They might as well ask if I’d like to step into their van and get murdered.

He thought I was mad, but in an artistic way; I thought he was horny all the time, but in an artistic way.

Light some candles and use those bath salts you've been saving for a special occasion. Masturbate for 55 minutes.

I would send some chocolates, but I’m not allowed anymore since they found the shiv in the birthday cake I sent you.

Everywhere you look these days (on Instagram), beautiful pictures abound. From teacups overflowing with succulents to smoothie bowls arranged as art. All while a lavender-haired model casually eats ice cream in front of a stupidly gorgeous Tahitian sunset. All this endless beauty has become a bit dull.

We’ve all been there. Your boyfriend has a raging boner, but you’re just not in the mood to do anything with it. But how do you tell him to tone that boner down and quick? No need to worry. Here are ten simple, foolproof ways to kill that boner in ten seconds—or less—while keeping your man’s ego rock-hard.

The case of beer I brought, as my mother explained, is “pure poison” and so I must drink it all by myself.

There are some hipster things that hipsters want us to love, so we’ll join their cult. But we’re done falling for these things because we’re all unique individuals. Here are 10 things you need to avoid right now if you don’t want to be a hipster.

Surviving the Apocalypse didn’t mean they couldn’t enjoy a little romance.