Kate Ryan

She got too high while watching The Bachelor and had a misanthropic breakdown.

Everywhere you look these days (on Instagram), beautiful pictures abound. From teacups overflowing with succulents to smoothie bowls arranged as art. All while a lavender-haired model casually eats ice cream in front of a stupidly gorgeous Tahitian sunset. All this endless beauty has become a bit dull.

Hollywood continues to flounder in a dick-sucking frenzy of self-congratulatory white male directors, writers, and producers.

For all of you crazy people that think going to Target is ever a good idea during the holiday season, this is a list on how to survive a shopping trip to Target is for you…

At Monster High, Jimmy Werewolf gets another demerit for forgetting to shave again.

She couldn’t imagine the water she sat in, the water that enveloped her body, wanted to be here.

For the record, I didn’t mean to be born so tall. I didn’t ask for bulky shoulders or a head that doesn’t fit most hats.

Someone would always cook in their tighty whities, his package at eye level for the person doing French homework at the kitchen table.

It was a tradition of theirs. When siblings Sue and Johnny went home to their mother’s for Christmas, they watched the 11 o’clock local news.

He thought I was mad, but in an artistic way; I thought he was horny all the time, but in an artistic way.