Credit: Facebook
Some days, I grow weary. Most of the time, I throw on my earbuds and bounce through my day, undeterred from the bombardment of deleterious messages I get from society (like, for example, that I should be concerned with Renee Zellweger’s face). But some days, like today, I grow weary from attempting to carve out and own space in a world that isn’t always convinced I deserve it—not with all the opinions and ideas and thoughts that go along with that space.
Because here’s the thing. I’m a woman—with a brain and stuff . . . but I’m not married, nor do I have children. Worse, these are not even things *gasp* I am even particularly interested in. Contemplating the 2.5 children, white-picket-fence house “dream”? At least at this juncture, it makes me feel like I’m going to asphyxiate.
I have a fulfilling job, friends, passions, hobbies, interests—not to mention, deep concerns about a multitude of broader societal issues, about which I'm quite knowledgeable. But apparently this is not enough; not enough to fulfill my role in society, to be taken seriously. Not with this empty womb and bare left ring finger, it’s not.
I grow weary of this cultural script that casts single people, and young people, and women-people (not to mention the myriad marginalized groups who aren't cutting the societal mustard by not being straight or cisgender, etc.) as “less than” just because we dare step a toe out of this cultural narrative obsessed with marriage and babies. It’s a narrative that grows constantly sillier and more offensive as more people than ever choose to live on their own, or not reproduce—especially as much of this is driven by a terrible economy and a society increasingly eviscerated by inequality.
And while this script is a constant white noise in my life, some days it’s winnowed down to a precise face whose mouth speaks words that explicitly seek to discredit all that I have and am and work toward. Today that face belongs to Fox News host Kimberly Guilfoyle.
In a segment on Fox Five, where the prestigious panel (recently famous for a particularly noxious “boobs on the ground” comment concerning a female UAE fighter pilot) was discussing elections and voting, Guilfoyle advocated that young women shouldn’t exercise their democratic rights and burden themselves with casting a ballot in the upcoming midterm elections. We. just. don’t. get. it.
“It’s the same reason why young women on juries are not a good idea. They don’t get it! They’re not in that same life experience of paying the bills, doing the mortgage, kids, community, crime, education, healthcare. They’re like healthy and hot and running around without a care in the world.”
Enter: my weariness.
A weariness that only grew when she went on to say:
“I just thank and excuse them so they can go back on Tinder or Match.com.”
Le sigh. Because yes, we are just hot and healthy and running around looking for a mate to wed, buy a house, get knocked up and finally grow in a bit of wisdom such that we "get it" enough to exercise our fundamental right to vote.
You can watch her say these things below . . . but maybe only do it for the shock value of hearing such nonsense in 2014, and only if watching it has value for how you live your life—which you know best how to live, no matter what society or a Fox News shock-host would have you believe.
