We went there.
“For me it's always seemed like, for whatever reason, this topic is so taboo! We can talk about it about guys for days!”
This week we’re kicking off a new feature — because I’m a Pioneering Journalist. We like to keep things fresh (both kinds).
Each week, as part of our #RealRavishly campaign, I’ll be offering up a topic on my page for your discussion/opinion/education/horror (if you haven’t added me, do so here or here, or BOTH!). Comment! Like! Share! Congratulations, you’ve just been promoted to Contributor.
The suspense. It kills.
This week's topic: EJACULATION (specifically the one that involves XX chromosome). AKA squirting.
Myth? Legend? Skill? Party trick? MUST KNOW?
This is what I asked: Sex positive zone! PG-13 (R?) status: Would you share your thoughts on female ejaculation? (Asking for a friend, writing a thing. [me])
And here’s what you Ravishers said (stay tuned for a how-to at the end):
Veronica sets the tone: “For me it's always seemed like, for whatever reason, this topic is so taboo! We can talk about it about guys for days!”
I know, right? That’s why we’re here, Veronica!
BUT, Amanda says, hype, not real, PEE: “The act of squirting (in my researched opinion) is simply just the bladder emptying and the urethra expelling urine. I understand it's a debated opinion but I (personally) side with science on this one. With that being said, much like the debated opinions on sex during menstruation... Fluid is fluid is fluid. If you and your partner are into it I say slap a raincoat on & go for it. Whatever the fluid is, shouldn't matter in the least. If it feels good, do it.”
Julian refutes: “Science says a lot of funny things about females.... From experience I would say it's definitely not pee.”
A number of you were confuzzled, neutral, unsure, didn’t know anything, or wanted to LEARN:
Adiba: “Here's my thought: oh Jedi master... please teach me how.”
Lisa: “I don't know anything about it.”
Alyssa: “How are there any other thoughts other than “awesome”!?"
I was thinking the same thing, Alyssa.
Holly summed it up nicely for many of us: “Elusive yet sought after, intrigue, mystery and to address the physical aspect of your orgasm being seen, like a man's is also super cool. Instructions please! (Although everyone is different)”
And some of you are just SKILLED.
Andrea: “For me it's an orgasm brought on by the gods lol. I love normal sex and orgasms but to squirt brings it to another level. I can feel it through out my entire body. It's an emotional situation too. I believe you have to fully trust your partner and let your self go. Your inhibitions have to be let go. After the first time with my husband I knew I could be comfortable. He loved it and really got turned on even more. I think every woman can do it. It just takes patience and trust with your partner.”
Christina: "I had it once in my early 20s and my boyfriend spent many years trying to get it happen again for his pleasure as well as mine but it never reemerged until about 5 years ago. Now I can't control my ejaculations. I absolutely love it, however my bed sheets usually end up saturated and I often blame it on him. Lol."
Chrystal (of Curvy Girl Lingerie): "Oh do not get me going...I could talk about it for hours." (I went to see Chrystal in person for a lesson. Will report.)
One of my dear transgender friends, Sam, makes an important point: "Let's start with how cissexist it is that we keep calling it "female" ejaculation and how we really need a new phrase so that trans folks like me don't have to call themselves "female" just to discuss their own bodily functions.”
Britni helped us out with that: "The technical term is ejaculation of the urethral sponge. "Vaginal ejaculation" is technically wrong, since it comes out of the urethra but may work colloquially. "Ejaculation that occurs after/as a result of/due to g-spot stimulation?"
Some of us probably don't know what the urethral sponge is, so we can just say squirting.
One of my dude friends: “I'm all for it. It's natural and normal for people to have a sexual release, and when the real thing is not feasible, masturbation for both men AND women is a very suitable substitute. Plus, I love seeing a women get herself off.”
Alright dude friend! Other dudes? Comment below!
One of my dear friends: “I want to respond to your post about female ejaculation. I have crazy orgasms. I have experienced the urine type as well as the "other than pee" type. Very very different. The other than was most definitely NOT pee. Science is cool, but not perfect-especially when it comes to women. So that's my experience.”
SIGN ME UP.
One of my friends and her husband gave me explicit instructions which I am going to share with you (it’s long and detailed, and WORTH READING):
“With palm facing up using middle and ring finger together you curl them up toward the abdomen. Actively stroke the top of the vagina slowly at first, then the texture changes. As the texture changes, you start using all three in an almost scooping way [there is a small shelf]. The walls swell and the lubrication starts to thin out it builds and then crescendos. If I were to stop then she wouldn't ejaculate. If I continue, I start to feel it thin to nearly water, then EJACULATION TIME. It feels and sounds ( at least i can hear it ) like i am splashing in a bowl, the liquid at this point is almost acidic, like an astringent (it doesn’t smell at all like urine and wife R explains, she has “tons of pee” after).”
R knows she is lucky to have an attentive husband and I know she does, because I ASKED HER.
Well, there you go, the first installment in the #RealRavishly Q&A series.
BRB looking for husband.