Kelly Davio

Maybe you were feeling a little too confident this week—a little too put-together or in control of your life. It’s okay, it happens to all of us from time to time. You take a break from fashion magazines and celebrity websites, and before you know it, you begin to feel like you’re a competent, productive, adequate human being.

I stopped hosting the holiday at my house, and instead of inviting a barrage of people over for face-stuffing, I turned Thanksgiving into a quiet day at home—just me and my partner—and yes, plenty of pie and mashed potatoes.

College application season is nearly upon us and it’s an exciting a time for high school seniors, as well as a nerve-wracking time for parents. You've no doubt you’ve gone through your budget, talked about majors and programs, maybe visited a few campuses with your kid.

If fashion bloggers are to be believed, the moment a woman turns 30, she undergoes a horrifying physical transformation that leaves her incapable of wearing most of what’s in her closet. So imagine my surprise when the clock struck midnight on my 29th year and I did not, in fact, sprout a pair of horns.

If you’re like me (which is to say stark white), you may find yourself looking to warm up your retina-searing paleness before hitting the beach. It’s a public service, really. Think of the children!

If you’ve gone shopping for underwear recently, odds are you’ve noticed a new trend toward higher waistlines, lower leg cuts, and a great deal more fabric on the rear view. It seems that skimpy is out, and Grandma’s Fruit of the Loom value pack is in.

Unfortunately, public restroom soap is a bacterial nightmare. It’s so filthy, in fact, that a recent study found that a quarter of all public soap pumps are so contaminated with fecal bacteria that washing with their contents leaves your hands more germy than if you didn’t wash at all.

Steroids are powerhouses when it comes to combating a range of medical issues, but the physical changes can be extreme. Steroids change your face.

The bad news is that, no matter what you do, you’re unlikely to get any personal space at the gym — even when there are plenty of machines available, it is a law of the universe that some man will choose to work out no fewer than six inches from you.

I knew that House Hunters family of shows had been accused of being entirely staged, but still, I had hopes that the two of us would find our own plucky agent who’d supply us with wonderful apartments to choose from, then we’d calmly, collaboratively pick one while sipping ale at a local pub.