Melissa A. Fabello

Melissa A. Fabello

Bio

Melissa A. Fabello is a sexuality educator, body image and eating disorder activist, and media literacy vlogger based out of Philadelphia. She currently works as a Managing Editor of Everyday Feminism and is a PhD candidate in Human Sexuality Studies. Follow her on Twitter @fyeahmfabello.

Melissa A. Fabello Articles

Sexual Fluidity: Queer, Straight, And Anything Else You're Feeling

Right now, today, as of writing this, I identify as queer. But I didn’t always.

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Let Them Eat Cake: My Weight Restoration Story

And so I slid the scale to the back of my closet, started freely eating doughnuts when I craved doughnuts, and simply donated the jeans that stopped fitting instead of holding out hope for them.

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Bottom line: communicate.

Sex And Eating Disorders: A Guide

Not everyone who has had an eating disorder also has an issue with perfectionism, but the two are often linked: A persistent feeling of never being “good enough” and needing to do something — anything — to feel under control is a warning sign that a person might be susceptible to an eating disorder.

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jealous of a dog.

Inside My Eating Disorder

I was jealous of the dog. “That dog gets to be so thin,” I tried to explain, tearfully, to my partner, “and it doesn’t even have to try. I’ll never be that thin.”

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6 Things About Eating Disorders That You Probably Actually Really Don’t Know

"A common response that folks struggling with eating disorders hear is something along the lines of “Just eat,” “Just stop purging,” or “Just stop overeating.” And that’s akin to telling someone with depression to “Cheer up” or someone with anxiety to “Calm down.” That is: It’s not effective. At all. It’s actually kind of offensive."

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Sonja Renee Taylor of TBINAA.

The Body Acceptance Movement Is Ignoring Some Really Important Bodies

Uh, in case you haven’t noticed, the body acceptance movement has a bit of a body rejection problem. Namely, anyone who isn’t a thin, white, able-bodied, straight, middle class, cisgender woman gets left out of the movement altogether — which, in my opinion, isn’t very accepting.

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4 Actual Solutions You Can Try When You’re Having a Bad Body Image Day

"Just like sitting with your negative feelings, looking at the body that you’re unhappy with puts you in the position of being the boss of your situation. It’s a way of reminding the voices in your head that you are the one in charge here — and that the smallest shift in thought or intent can turn your whole day around."

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Thanksgiving ain't easy.

3 Tips For Surviving Thanksgiving When You Struggle With An Eating Disorder

I’m a big proponent of teaching our loved ones how, during the holidays, to be gentle with our eating disorders (both in recovery and out).

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long distance love . . . it's possible.

Long Distance Dates: How To Date Your Partner 3,000 Miles Away

Another awesome idea, whether the relationship is new or established, is to look at a sexual inventory checklist (like this one). The list goes through different sexual situations that are important to discuss with a partner – from body boundaries to birth control and safer sex options to what you’ve done, what you’d like to try, and what’s a big “no” for you. It’s a great, less-awkward avenue to talking about sex in a big way and to understand one another’s needs more intimately.

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It's about the shit culture that we live in — one in which sexuality education comes mostly from mainstream pornography and locker room talks, and where disrespect for and objectification of women runs rampant. Image: thinkstock.com

20 Things Guys Have Actually Said To Me In Bed

In my experience dating and sleeping with straight, cisgender dudes who worship hegemonic masculinity, I’ve noticed that there’s something really — umm — special about how they go about sexuality.

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