Today is National Tattoo Day! Well . . . at least according to a Facebook page that hasn't been active since 2010. And some people from a tattoo removal company. So maybe it doesn't exist after all—but we're still celebrating it on the grounds that everything posted to Facebook is 100% factual.
To honor this possibly-not-real holiday, we bring you the least sexy sex tattooes of all time. Perhaps it's time for them to call that tattoo removal company.
1. Naked Reading Time
Really? Honey, if you're lucky, there will be no reading of anything once the clothes come off.
Le sigh. I spoke too soon. If you have to remind your sexual partners that they're lucky to be bedding you, perhaps you have some soul searching to do.
Yes, please do no look at the tattoo on which I spent hundreds of dollars. I truly wish to be left alone with my eye boobs, thank you. Side note: brows are supposed to start at the inner corners of your eyeballs.
Oh dear. More reading. What ever happened to the value of body language?
Ah, the classic dismembered male genitalia. See how the erect penis sits atop anatomically impossibly small balls, reminiscent of a rancid potato. Appreciate the boundaries of physics that were broken in the crafting of this entity. Note the whisper of jizz that soars upwards in a sea of passion.
Image: I'm looking for something subtle, terrifying yet in good taste. Perhaps a vagina-monster? Courtesy of ThinkStock
