Bodies

I’ve been around for 19 whole years now, and while I by no means have all the answers on how to cope with anxiety, I like to think that I have a few pretty useful ones. But I also like to think that Seal and Heidi Klum will get back together one day, so proceed with caution.

I was relieved to know that my disease was just that — a dis-ease. It wasn’t bad willpower or morals — I had a three-fold disease of mind, body and spirit.

Although many women feel it’s about time the historically male-dominated pharmaceutical industry woke up and smelled the sexual needs of women, not all women are celebrating Flibanserin's approval.

Although my underlying disease has no treatment, many of the symptoms of my disease can be treated, and even a small reduction in my symptoms can be life-changing for me. Yet, unless I really push my doctors for a treatment plan, they rarely offer any suggestions. I understand that there is no pill to cure me, and I don't feel bad when my doctor doesn't have one to offer.

Going into a McDonald’s and ordering one of my favourite meals is never a fun experience. Why? Because I’m fat. Every time I go in there, I feel like I’m being judged. I feel like the staff and other customers there could be looking at my protruding belly and assuming that I don’t look after myself, that McDonalds is all I eat, and that I am capable of eating three to four meals’ worth of the stuff in one sitting.

When she began sliding the spatula beneath one of my Aunt Jemimas, I got the picture. She tried lifting, smushing, and packing my boob together, much like you would eggs that are running all over the pan.

As I grew older, I came to rely upon dieting as a way to ease my anxiety and feel in control. I was no longer in a cycle of eating too little or body dysmorphia, but controlling my food intake made me feel less invisible in a sea of girls where I felt like I'd disappear. It was almost a form of self-medication, to know that I could go on a diet and lose a few pounds.

Body neutrality is having hot sex with your partner and never overthinking the way that your ass smacks against their thighs. It’s not being embarrassed that you have fat on your body that is affected both by gravity and inertia, nor necessarily feeling sexier because you have fat on your body that is affected both by gravity and inertia. It’s enjoying that moment of intimacy, being comfortable in your body.