Allison Cooper

I think that before I actually became a mom, I dreamt of sick days to be filled with breakfasts in bed, handwritten notes with all the words spelled wrong, and misshapen pancakes — but the reality is far from that dream. I'm flustered just thinking about it.

I grew up dreaming of living in that house with the perfect blue shutters and the white picket fence, three perfectly interspaced children running

Disney can be exhausting if you don’t enter the parks with a plan, use your Fast Passes strategically, and always know where they nearest Starbucks is.

Yes, it’s a public place, but neither myself or any movie-going patron should have to worry that they might not be able to hear what’s being said on the big screen because a baby is crying. End of story.

I know these kids need both parents in their lives to learn to grow to be successful human adults, but some days, I’d like to be remembered as the fun parent.

10. 15 minutes alone in the grocery store has become your equivalent to a therapy session.

Whenever you see a mom rocking her “mom-leggings,” and you judge or shame her, I beg you to take an effing step back, get off your high horse and take a second to understand that she’s just been through a lot and these leggings are giving her life.