Jody Allard

Jody Allard

Bio

Jody Allard is a former techie turned freelance writer living in Seattle. Her online work has appeared on Time, xoJane, and Offbeat Home, among others. She writes primarily about food, family, mothering, and life with a chronic illness. 

Jody Allard Articles

Brace Yourselves, Grammar Sticklers: Singular "They" Is The Word Of The Year 

As a former English lit major and long-time editor, I've met my share of linguistics pedants. Today is not their day. But for everyone else who appreciates the natural evolution of language, rejoice! Singular "they" was just named 2015's Word of the Year.

Read...

Man Punches Elderly Costco Shopper In The Face Over Nutella Waffle Samples

If you're anything like me, the only enjoyable part of shopping at Costco is the samples. It's always packed, there's nowhere to park, people push their massive fucking carts slower than molasses in January, and everything about it makes me homicidal EXCEPT for the sweet, sweet lure of the samples.

Read...

Homeless Woman Arrested For Stealing $32 Of Food From Wal-Mart

Drug addicted, homeless, and hungry don't add up to hilarity. Neither does the system that arrested this woman for stealing $32 worth of food in a country that throws away 263 millions pounds of food every day –– or a news cycle that chews up and spits out the needy for clicks and likes.

Read...

This Week's Edition Of Why We Still Need Feminism

Instead of delving into the psychological and scientific impacts of their work, reporters asked the astronauts how they would survive without makeup and men in space.

Read...

Former President Jimmy Carter Is Cancer Free. Thanks, Science!

Former President Jimmy Carter announced that his most recent scans showed no evidence of cancer, and he may owe his rapid response to science.

Read...

Brace Yourselves, Kids of the '90s, Nickelodeon May Bring Back Your Favorite Shows

If you lay awake at night praying for new episodes of your favorite childhood TV shows, your prayers may soon be answered. Nickelodeon confirmed that it is considering re-boots of its most beloved shows from the 80s and 90s.

Read...

Oregon Militia Is Not Amused By Dildos Arriving In The Mail

Once upon a time, a band of heavily-armed men decided to take over an Oregon federal building. Because they were white, the Feds didn't shoot them in 12 seconds, and nobody even really did anything about it. (Possibly also because these intrepid defenders of our Constitution decided to seize a bird sanctuary.)

Read...

News Flash: The Catholic Church Says Domestic Violence Is Your Fault

He characterized the "serious problem" with domestic violence as a failure by the couples to have "a true marriage" and attacked the politicians who support what he termed "quickie divorces" (you know, the ones that save battered women's lives).

Read...

Scientists Discover Ancient Viruses In the Arctic That Will Probably Kill Us All

No, really. It turns out that incredibly strong viruses have been chilling in the arctic (see what I did there?) for millennia, and NOW they are being uncovered by the melting of the ice.

Read...

LEGO Finally Responds To Parents' Pain From Stepping On LEGOs

If you have kids, you have probably experienced the unique pain of stepping on a LEGO. After years of listening to parents' tales of woe, LEGO has finally devised a solution: adult-sized LEGO slippers to protect your precious feet.

Read...