Rebekah Kuschmider

Yeah, no. No one wants their bottle of body wash to look like their actual body.

“I think the only card she has is the woman's card. She has nothing else going. Frankly, if Hillary Clinton were a man, I don't think she would get five percent of the vote.” I’m gonna need someone to hold my earrings here.

ERMEHGERD! HERRY PERTTER!!!!!!!!!!

This is Jungletrax Abiding Ovation and she is an award winning Bengal cat who’s all kinds of cat-famous.

For all of us who have wished we could be hooked up to an IV of coffee, the moment may have arrived! No, your doctor isn’t willing to install a PIC line for you to hook up to an urn at your local Starbucks. Instead, some entrepreneurs are crowd-funding to produce a bracelet that administers a steady stream of transdermal caffeine.

President Obama is not here for campus sexual assault. Literally.

You could probably look on the internet and find people whining about the changes, but I’m in too good a mood about seeing women and minorities on my money to go looking for bigots and their rainy damn parades.

So far, April is mainly just walking around and not giving birth, which is probably annoying to poor April. There’s nothing quite like the end of pregnancy, when you just want to be done with it and get to the part where you have a baby. Maybe it’s different for giraffes, but that’s sure how I felt when I was pregnant.

Hi. Happy Super Tuesday. Did you get out and vote if your state is holding a primary today? Good, good.

It makes us feel better to say “My kid would never…” but you know what? Any kid might. They run into the street, they climb too high in trees, they put things they find on the ground in their mouths — and it all happens in a second, while a parent’s head is turned.