dating advice

Dear Erin, OK, I am sure I’m going to catch hell for this, but I created a fake profile on Tinder. I mean, the profile isn’t completely fake, but the pictures are.

Anyone can be “nice.” Nice involves a surface-level politeness that does not have to be genuine and it does not require empathy or integrity.

I dated a man who was slightly kind, but sort of a bad boy. He didn’t try very hard to get me and wasn’t very affectionate. He did just enough to get me on the hook and I enjoyed the chase.

As an African-American woman, I sympathize greatly with the plight of Black men in America. The most troubling issue for me is the slanted press and stereotypes Black men endure, resulting in them carrying a skewed reputation of being violent, lazy criminals everywhere they go.

I went on a date last week. We had drinks, we chatted — an overall good night. At the end he asked me, “Do you want to go somewhere?” I said “sure,” thinking it was just a walk.

You’ve met someone who you actually like. There you are, on your first date, and you think, I can’t believe how well this is going.

I am a long-time serial monogamist. At 27, I’ve had three serious relationships, but have never just dated. I’ve always just had significant others as an adult, and now, being single for a sustained period of time for the first time since high school, I’m finally entering the dating world. And I don’t have any idea what I’m doing.

I recently returned to the online dating arena and was immediately reminded of why I left. As a man interested in the arts I find myself at odds with that acme of the stereotypical alpha male, bare chested post-gym workout selfie. Ladies, here are my notes on what you should expect from a manly man vs. a hipster dude on OkCupid.