Erin Khar

I get it. People think they're helpful, sharing their experience. I give advice weekly; who am I to talk? But the thing is, why is so much of the advice given to pregnant people so negative?

When we talk about choice in the world of reproduction, we often distill it to views on abortion. We fight for the right to choose, to have agency over our bodies. Why, for some, does that exclude other choices?

As I began to heal, I realized that I had neglected to fully appreciate the grief those closest to me carried. I’m talking about my husband. And my son. And our parents. And our closest friends. Their bereavement was undeniable, yet it took me a moment to acknowledge that it was there.

I’m a 35-year-old widower with two little girls to look after. It has now been a little over two years since my wife died. Quite suddenly, since last winter, I began having multiple very erotic dreams, always about my late wife. All the medical data seems pointed towards widowers losing their sex drive. Mine has suddenly kicked into over drive.

I’m afraid I’m going to lose my wife to AA. My wife and I are both in our mid 30s and we’ve been married for six years, together for nine. When we met, we both drank socially, or I thought we did. I started noticing after we got married that her drinking increased.

Rav’s Repro is a column in which Erin explores all topics related to reproduction and reproductive rights.

When you mumble, I think you don’t really care about what you have to say or I’m not important enough to hear you. Is it shyness? Is it laziness? Is it apathy? Have you forgotten how to speak properly because of your reliance on texting? Whatever it is, it has to STOP. Low-talkers, I’m looking at you, too.

She’s made all the mistakes, so you don’t have to…Ask Erin!

My boyfriend is ignoring me. I am 32 and he is 34. We have been together for six months. We are both pretty busy with work etc, but I always make him a priority. I always feel like I am giving more than he does and it’s come to a crisis point.

Here are some further thoughts on miscarriage, the Internet, and how we can be supportive to women going through one.