Human Barbie Banishes Food for Air and Light: We Call Intervention

When the aliens decide that Earthlings are just too damn dumb for brain harvesting, we’ll have wacko Valeria Lukyanova to thank. This 23-year-old Ukrainian model aims to look like Barbie (and she’s not alone), and has decided that the best way to achieve those unrealistic proportions is to consume only light and air. Makes sense to us!

Sadly, she's not the first to discover the benefits of “Breatharianism," whose followers believe that eating food and drinking water is unnecessary. Light and air, according to them, is all the sustinance we need. Breatharians “survive” on “prana,” which is the Sanskrit word for “life air.” Other religions acknowledge prana in their teachings, but they see it more as an energy that you can absorb, not as a nutrient for your body

Not surprisingly, people die  following Breatharianism’s teachings. While other religions (like Islam and Hinduism) are totally down to fast — and believe in the spiritual power of withholding bodily cravings — they eventually eat again. Breatharians just wean themselves off food completely.

So yeah, I know what you’re thinking — where I come from, this is called anorexia and it’s treated with interventions, tears, and tense trips to the therapist’s office. But there’s more to Breatharianism than just your usual batch of self-loathing, body image sh*t. Followers believe that in practicing the sole consumption of light and air, they'll slowly ascend to another universe. Because people are literally dying for this belief, Breatharianism has more in common with a doomsday cult, like Jonestown, than a passing, celebrity-hyped spiritual trend, a la Kabbalah bracelets.

And what’s sadder still is this: the world sees Valeria as an object. Her Facebook page boasts close to 100,000 followers, but — as with any attractive woman — people are eager to tear her down.

“You have really ugly feet! That’s not perfect!” one follower complained.

“Forever alone,” another joked.  

“Is that Michael Jackson?” pondered one.

Breathariansim is totes crazy — we get that. And as for Valeria? We're not sure anyone will take her seriously enough to pull an intervention and some folks may be of the belief that she deserves any and all ridicule/sorrow/general sh*ttiness that comes her way because she's "done it to herself." But c'mon, for the sake of societal sanity, anti-daddy issues, self-love, and the pure bliss of scarfing down Sunday brunch ... can someone please get this chick to a doctor?

Image: courtesy of Valeria's Facebook page

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