Britni de la Cretaz

Britni de la Cretaz

Bio

Britni de la Cretaz is a feminist mama, recovered alcoholic, and community organizer in Boston, MA. She's a founding member of Safe Hub Collective. You can find her on Twitter at @britnidlc.

Britni de la Cretaz Articles

Don't presume heterosexuality. Image: Thinkstock.

On Parenting And Compulsory Heterosexuality

I want my child to be able to self-determine. What that means to me is that they know they have options besides the “default” one that’s plastered all over their TV screens, and that they always know that.

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Britni de la Cretaz.

An Open Letter To Men: Why I Don’t Care What You Think About My Amazing Technicolor Dream Hair

My hair makes me happy and I dye it for my own enjoyment— not for yours. I mean, that’s cool if you happen to like it, too, but you don’t have to tell me about it. You can keep it to yourself, write it in your dream journal, take it to your grave. I don’t care what you do with it, I just know that I don’t need to know about it.

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5 Ways To Support A Loved One Struggling With Addiction

Loving someone who struggles with alcoholism and addiction is one of the hardest things to do. It’s a drain on friends and family in both financial and emotional ways. It comes with ups and downs, characterized by periods of hope followed by devastation when you’re let down yet again.

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Even if our situations were similar, we are different people.

My Husband Is A Better Parent Than Me

My husband never, ever drives thru a fast food restaurant because it’s easier, and instead makes it back to the house and gives our daughter something that WILL grow mold if left out too long, unlike the McDonald’s hamburger I would have let her have.

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Contemplation.

I Named My Rapist On Facebook. I Wasn’t Prepared For What Happened Next.

I’m working on an essay about the time I was raped my freshman year of college. For the very first time, I’m naming my perpetrator. Even if it’s only his first name, there’s still so much power in it.

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She’s more than mindless, fluffy pop music and she always has been. She’s an incredible vocalist and a great songwriter. She gave me hope when I needed it most, and I wish I could do the same for her. Image: Wikimedia.

Kesha Saved My Life — And Is Still Saving It

I stared at the picture of her sitting in the courtroom sobbing; I read the news stories, and I cried, too. As a sexual assault survivor myself, I felt a lot of things in that moment. Above all, the ruling was a reminder to me that, as a woman, I do not matter. Not in the eyes of society, not in the eyes of the law. It was a reminder that I do not deserve safety, nor will I be guaranteed it. It was a reminder that my body is not mine, and it never has been.

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Things You Need To Know About Becoming Sober As A Trauma Survivor

“My name is Britni, and I’m an alcoholic.” I’ve said those words more times than I can count and they’re always met with nods of recognition and assurances of “me too.” I’m also a survivor of rape and sexual assault, and it’s a big part of my addiction story.

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Seven Years After The Abuse, And Triggers Still Remain

It’s been seven years since I left him. Most days he doesn’t cross my mind. I forget that he existed. The things that he put me through are filed away somewhere that never gets opened. I’ve done the work of understanding what I went through, of forgiving him for the abuse, of moving on with my life.

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BDSM and the use of safewords.

How Safewords Helped Me Reclaim My Sexual Power

The first time I remember learning what a safeword was, I was sitting in my college dorm, devouring blogs about kink and BDSM. It all seemed so foreign to me, a teenager who couldn’t imagine real people doing any of the taboo things these blogs talked about.

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