Eliana Osborn

I’m terrified of wrongful imprisonment. To be the only one who knows the truth and have to live every day in a cell, wondering, why, god, why? [...] Sitting hooked up for gadgets to monitor every aspect of my mind and body, in a small room without any distraction, I see how a person could lose herself — or the truth — for a moment.

Eighteen hours, even if prepared with reading and art material, snacks, and an upgrade to China Airline’s family couch seating, is still EIGHTEEN HOURS.

Best case scenario? A few hours of activity, then we all fall asleep comfortably. Worst case? Well, let's just say it involves blood splatter on those weird double-paned airplane window.

I’m not there yet. But I need to be honest—I’m closer to 40 than any other multiple of five.

84% of full professors in America are White. In case you were unsure, that does not match the overall makeup of the country or the student body.

If you kill a tortoise, even on accident, you probably shouldn’t have children.

I always have a small piece of my brain on mom mode, no matter what else is happening. I have no problem with this, since that is how humanity has survived.

Don’t listen to horror stories about airplane tantrums. Listen to me while I let you in on the secret perks of seeing the world with kiddos.

I wanted to write a book last summer. Then I realized what a terrible goal that was and modified accordingly.

They were horrible.

I’ve developed a fast and furious passion for the new Daily Show host, Trevor Noah.