Eliana Osborn

Your partner will make you want to throw up at some point. Pure, unadulterated disgust.

I, like far too many women in this country and the world, have had a wide variety of experiences involving sexual harassment.

1. Borrow a child.

I’ve developed a fast and furious passion for the new Daily Show host, Trevor Noah.

I’m not broken by this therapy failure. Jane wasn't the person to help me at this point of my life. Someone else WILL be.

Size, like age and salary and whatever else, is just a number. Pretending numbers don’t measure things isn’t helpful. I’m 38 years old: That isn’t good or bad, but it IS different from being 18 or 50.

Now that I’m a mother, I’m much more sympathetic to a woman who just couldn’t take it anymore. Not saying I’d leave my kids in a parking lot and hope for the best . . . just saying that I can understand the impulse.

I look tired when I stay up too late. I also look tired if I get eight hours of sleep.

A haircut is a whole lot cheaper than therapy or tattoos or a round-the-world plane ticket.

Look, Connect Four is not a good game. But it can be over quickly, which is pretty great.