Eliana Osborn

When did I discover that sterilization isn’t as cut and dry as it seems? While sitting in a hospital gown, signing my life away, awaiting surgery.

Help.

The most important things my mother taught me included work from Neil Diamond, Billy Joel, Wham! and Whitney Houston.

A haircut is a whole lot cheaper than therapy or tattoos or a round-the-world plane ticket.

I look tired when I stay up too late. I also look tired if I get eight hours of sleep.

1. Borrow a child.

Is anyone else with me on this? White foods are NASTY.

Sometimes the nicest kids turn into whole new people when they come over to your house.

They were horrible.

Don’t listen to horror stories about airplane tantrums. Listen to me while I let you in on the secret perks of seeing the world with kiddos.