Jody Allard

Jody Allard

Bio

Jody Allard is a former techie turned freelance writer living in Seattle. Her online work has appeared on Time, xoJane, and Offbeat Home, among others. She writes primarily about food, family, mothering, and life with a chronic illness. 

Jody Allard Articles

Man Punches Elderly Costco Shopper In The Face Over Nutella Waffle Samples

If you're anything like me, the only enjoyable part of shopping at Costco is the samples. It's always packed, there's nowhere to park, people push their massive fucking carts slower than molasses in January, and everything about it makes me homicidal EXCEPT for the sweet, sweet lure of the samples.

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In Honor Of Election Day, Get Your Vote AND Your Sandwich On

It's Election Day AND National Sandwich Day today and, somehow, I feel like these important two events must be related.

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Target To Open Its First Store WITH A BAR

A Target spokesperson has confirmed that a Chicago neighborhood will soon be the lucky recipient of a brand spanking new Target –– complete with a BAR. That has ALCOHOL.

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The author and her SEVEN CHILDREN.

7 Things I've Learned From Raising 7 Kids

Through the years, I've learned that our ideologies matter far less than the quality of the relationships we build with our kids. Your rules and my rules may be entirely different, but if we center our parenting around nurturing and compassion for our kids, we will achieve similar results.

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Bruce Willis Caters Meals for Firefighters Battling Idaho Wildfires

ICYMI, half of my home state of Washington, as well as our neighboring state of Idaho, has been or is currently on fire.

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Donald Trump Wants To Ban Muslims, Amazon CEO Has Better Idea

ICYMI, everyone's favorite drunk uncle Donald Trump announced that he's in favor of banning all Muslims from the United States –– including American citizens who leave the country for terrorist-loving activities like going on vacation.

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#YouAintNoMuslimBruv Hashtag Trends In Wake Of London Attack

A man who stabbed three people in a London subway station Saturday tried to instill fear of ISIS by yelling "This is for Syria" as he was hauled away by police. Instead, it is the words of a bystander that captured the world's attention.

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It’s taken me much longer to figure out how to simply eat in a way that feels right in my body, and to accept my body for what it is — broken, fat, and mine.

On Learning To Accept My Chronically Ill Body

My only regret is that I wasted nearly 40 years trying to bend my chronically ill body to an imaginary idea of perfection.

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Don't be afraid.

It Doesn’t Matter What Causes Autism (But It Does Matter How We Treat It)

I know what autism looks like, and I understand why people are afraid of it because, at its worst moments, it is desperately, terribly ugly — it is children who can’t communicate, who become adults who are unable to live independently, and who simply cannot cope with the onslaught of sensory input that we barely notice. It is meltdowns that are triggered by nothing and everything, learning difficulties, and services that cost our healthcare system billions of dollars every year.

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