Joni Edelman

Body politics activist. Photographer. Chronic quoter of Monty Python. Unapologetic fat chick.

I said (on TV, to Rachael Ray, so there are a few million witnesses): If you want a bikini body, put a bikini on your body.

We've got Trump, Vladimir, Comey, and all the other players lined up for you. Here are the facts, followed by our IRL translation, to make sure you know that you know all abouts that latest (and possibly tenure-ending) Trump scandal.

4. A high school government class.

91% of women report dissatisfaction with their body. Ninety-one. I know you know math—that’s 9/10 of women.

1. All vaginas are good vaginas.

Look, I'm not saying McDonald's did this themselves, I'm just saying, a lot of the people that work there probably agree.

Our relationship has been a little complicated. I've loved you a lot, and I've loathed you at least that much, but mostly you've just gone unnoticed. Except for those 5 to 7 days every four weeks when you made your presence quite evident, what with the river of life blood and the random excruciating, and from what I can tell, unnecessary, contractions.

Nutritionists have weighed in on what to order at McDonald's. Here's what I think you should get instead.

I didn't get a lot of mothering as a child, but when I did, it was from her. She taught me how to sew, how to crochet. She taught me how to stand up for myself, to be tough. She taught me how to make fried chicken and fried okra, which I will never make, because it's fucking gross.