Rebekah Kuschmider

The race itself was anti-climactic because it wasn’t a race. It was basically two heats of a race. First, scientists convinced a wild great white to chase a hunk of fake seal meat for 100 meters so they could time it. Then Phelps donned a specially designed shark suit and swam the exact same route.

While Kanye West fans expected to get provocative musical performances during his Saint Pablo tour, audiences this weekend got a few surprises.

Listen, we’ve all been over this before. Human beings have bodies and those bodies are theirs to use as they see fit. They can put on clothes or not. They can be photographed or not. They can marry megalomaniacal real estate tycoons who think they’d be good at being president or not. AND ALL OF THAT IS JUST FINE.

So, who is more actively feminist this week? Ivanka, who can’t articulate a White House policy for bettering the lives of women? Or Beyoncé, who is shelling out big bucks to better the lives of women?

Finally, and this is very very important because it’s how feminism might go viral among men, you have to remain a feminist even when no women are around. That means, when you’re in a group of all guys and someone say something sexist as fuck, instead of laughing, you have to say “Dude. That was sexist as fuck.”

If you’re lucky enough to live near Willamette Valley in Oregon, you can get a dose of outdoor yoga with cute little goats at No Regrets Farm.

Born Prince Rogers Nelson in Minneapolis, Minnesota, the singer was known for… Jesus, fucking everything.

Lakeland Florida authorities were summoned by an alert citizen who told them, “I've got a dead body over here in the lake. Uh, it looks like an alligator is trying to pull it down under.”

In a move that proves karma to be the Most Righteous of All Bitches, the makers of those “scandalous” Planned Parenthood videos have been brought up on charges in connection with their operation.

They want to get paid more. Or they want to get promoted. Or they’re bored and want a new challenge. In fact, spending more time with family ranked 5th on the survey.