Rebekah Kuschmider

Yesterday, in the year 2016, the first Black woman Attorney General of the United States of America handed a White, conservative Southern governor his ass on live TV. And it was splendid.

Do you want a man known for calling people “losers” to be sitting at a table with all the major economic powers in the world and trying to work out international trade deals or arms agreements? Or do you think he’d offend everyone in the room so much that he’d turn us into a global pariah?

Canna Vine is making this miraculous concoction that consists of organic marijuana and biodynamically farmed grapes. I don’t know what biodynamic farming is but it does sound very special and like it would result in good tasting wine.

Yes, you read that right. Donkey. Milk.

We all need a little magic sometimes.

I got a puppy last fall, and I’ve spent about a zillion dollars on different things for her to chew. She really likes bully sticks, which are dehydrated bull penises. It cracks me up every time I give one to her and say, “Here. Go eat a dick.”

Yesterday, the the British Foreign Office updated its travel guidance regarding the US to reflect the risks to gay people who travel to North Carolina and Mississippi. The new laws passed in those states regarding the rights of LGBTQ people have made waves across the pond, and the Brits don’t want any of their own caught in a bigotry riptide.

This year, as a special treat from Mother Nature, who appears to be pro-choice, there will be a blizzard bearing down on DC as the marchers do their anti-choice thing. Now, I’m a long time DC area resident. I’ve seen a lot of these marches, and there are a few things I know:

Oh Ted Cruz, Ted Cruz, Ted Cruz. The Senator from Texas has been working hard this campaign season to shore up his conservative bona fides, including a memoir that talks about some of his more notable cases from when he was Solicitor General for Texas. But he skips a really interesting — nay — prurient case involving the legality of selling and using sex toys. Mother Jones ran a detailed analysis of it today and woo boy, is the internet going nuts!

Hopeful readers, may I present to you, the three-time mayor of Cormorant, Minnesota: DUKE!