Rebekah Kuschmider

Now, if you need me, I’m going to see if I can rig something similar for my dog so she can tell me if she’s barking at real danger or just a cheeky squirrel.

So, I’m scrolling through my news feed this morning, looking for something to brighten my day, and I see a headline that catches my eye. Seems 21 Jump Steet co-stars Channing Tatum and Jillian Bell are slated to star in a remake of Splash, the 1984 movie where Daryl Hannah played a mermaid seeking love on land. “Oh wow,” I thought to myself. “How cool would it be if Channing Tatum were the mer-person in this movie?”

This is Jungletrax Abiding Ovation and she is an award winning Bengal cat who’s all kinds of cat-famous.

Hi. Happy Super Tuesday. Did you get out and vote if your state is holding a primary today? Good, good.

If the first line of your personal dating profile reads: “Must love combovers, bankruptcy court, and misogyny,” have I got good news for you! There is now a special dating site just for singles who support Donald Trump.

After much deliberation, the Food Police have determined that caffeine, in moderation, is still not bad for people. You are free to drink 400 mg of caffeine a day— the equivalent of 36 ounces of regular coffee — and nothing bad will happen to you.

Follow these tips and you will look well-rested, you will not have camel toe, your underwire won’t poke you in the armpit, your hair will smell nice, your knuckles might not crack in the cold weather, and you will have enough money leftover for icing and sprinkles for the next absurd elementary school party. Huzzah!

Donald Trump aligns himself with bad people. He willfully insults good and honorable people. Speaking at the Value Voters Summit is a prime example.

Once the tiny 3D printed ovary was built, scientists were able to put living tissue harvested from mice into it — specifically, the follicles holding eggs — and implant the whole thing into a living mouse.

Allegedly, Botox in the scrotum can relax the scrotal sack and allow the balls to drop more, making them look more prominent. It also makes the scrotum less wrinkly. The guy in the video was pleased with the results and said his girlfriend was pleased as well. Same with the guy in Cosmo. So, that’s two happy customers who were willing to share their experience with the world wide web.