Rebekah Kuschmider

Do you know about skin cancer? Of course you do. It's not like it's a secret. Skin cancer is a very bad thing that can happen to anyone with skin. So if you're planning on tanning it up this year, easy solution: just don't.

Lakeland Florida authorities were summoned by an alert citizen who told them, “I've got a dead body over here in the lake. Uh, it looks like an alligator is trying to pull it down under.”

I can’t use this space today for quirky news blurbs. Instead, I want to remind us all of our fundamental right to have the America we want — and how we can get it.

I can’t speak for all feminists but I don’t have any guns for two reasons. First, I don’t hunt because I don’t want to eat any of the kinds of meat one can shoot in my region. Second, I have little kids. I know some people think having a gun around is a great way to protect little kids from potential threats but I see them as threats in and of themselves.

No word on whether Hill-dawg herself is a fan of crullers or jelly-filled.

The good news is that we seem to be gaining adult supervision in the White House for the moment. And in Congress. And also at the FBI.

“The reason cats are so pissy is they’re God’s perfect killing machines but they only weigh 8lbs and we keep picking them up and kissing them” - Da

Hi. Happy Super Tuesday. Did you get out and vote if your state is holding a primary today? Good, good.

What trans people are — unfortunately — is a handy punching bag for a wildly unpopular president. This man with his approval rating hovering under 40%, with his family under scrutiny for shady financial and political dealings, with his entire policy agenda — such as it is, considering he knows fuckall about policy — in jeopardy due to grassroots opposition to it, this man is flailing around looking for a distraction.

Everyone knows that Hillary Clinton got three million more votes than Donald Trump, right? Yeah. It’s true.