It was only a matter of time before virtual reality brought us the sex toy of the future.
That time, apparently, is now.
The latest in VR and sex is coming from CamSoda, an adult webcam platform — that means people streaming themselves doing sex stuff, for those of you who didn’t know. I actually didn’t know. I had to click on it and look at the site to figure it all out. People make money doing this. The site even offers health insurance to its performers. So that’s nice.
CamSoda is going to be launching a livestream that will sync up with both male and female “teledildonics.” That’s right. Teledildonics. It means technology for remote-control sex toys. I didn’t even know that was a word. Now I know that and I know about adult webcam platforms. Writing this article is the most educational thing that’s happened to me in ages.
All of this different technology — the webcams, the dildos — is going to join up with VR equipment like Google Cardboard, Oculus Rift and Samsung Gear so you can watch the porn and use your dildo and it will feel like the dildo is the porn performer and you’re having sex with that person.
Guys? I’m 42. I remember video stores with the “special section” in the back, behind a curtain. This is… I don’t quite know. It feels like something out of Blade Runner, honestly. And it seems like a lot of effort for an orgasm. I mean, most humans still come with hands, right?
Anyway, this service will debut on August 1. If you’re an early adopter of all the VR stuff and have the right kind of high-tech sex toy, this could be a real thrill. Get your real and virtual rocks off!