I broke my bad habits after I took a full year to be completely single and establish my self-worth, and fully love and accept myself and past mistakes.
I do not remember a time in my life when I was not a people-pleaser. I apologize often, and unnecessarily. I'm finally unlearning to people-please!
Taking care of yourself and conquering your people-pleasing ways doesn’t give you license to stop caring about other people’s feelings — especially your partner’s.
The problem with people pleasing: You’re trying so hard to be good. So how come you feel so bad?
How far should love go?
She’s made all the mistakes, so you don’t have to… Ask Erin is a weekly advice column, in which Erin answers your burning questions about anyt
Partners of those who grew up with tragic parenting are shocked by our capacity for self-loathing.
I grew up knowing my family always had its very own black cloud. Like a backyard pet that comes and goes when it pleases, a room locked but filled with things we weren’t allowed to look at or set free. And it was all passed down to me like some broken heirloom — my ancestor’s weaknesses and fears, swirled into DNA’s mad ritual. Does the body sometimes take into itself — take from its creators — what it cannot heal from? Sometimes, yes.
We’re adults. If I haven’t responded within half an hour, it’s probably because I’ve got something going on. Image: Thinkstock.
There’s a big difference between talking and communicating. One exists to relay messages, ideas, and feelings: the building blocks of being a person. The other exists to fill time. I’m by no means here to tell people how to approach their relationships — I just don’t want people to feel pressured to fill silences with noise out of the fear their partners won’t think they care.
My partner and I got together last December. The problem is that, while he loves me, my boyfriend hasn’t got over his ex. Being polyamorous, my partners loving other people as well is not a problem.