50 Reasons That Random Woman Might Not Want To Talk To You Right Now

Credit: Thinkstock

Credit: Thinkstock

Guys, let's review some of the reasons that woman you've never met might not feel like chatting, shall we?

There's a phenomenon that women experience fairly frequently, and it goes like this: we're on the street, or the subway, or a bus, or the express checkout line at the grocery store, and a random dude we don't know tries to strike up a conversation. We either don't engage with him, or try to subtly hint that we don't want to talk. Or maybe we just say, "I don't want to talk right now." And then, out of nowhere, this "nice" guy gets angry. He makes a scene or says "bitch" under his breath, or tells us we're stuck up and not worth his time.

Overall, it's a super fun interaction!

It's a fact that there are tons of men out there who get really angry when any woman, for any reason, doesn't drop whatever she's doing to make fawning small talk with them. Guys, let's review some of the reasons that woman you've never met might not feel like chatting, shall we? Because there are a ton of them. And every single one is totally valid.

  1. She just took a really big bite of peanut butter.

  2. She talked to clients all day at work and is really fucking sick of talking.

  3. She's making her singing debut at Carnegie Hall tonight and needs to save her voice.

  4. The last random guy she talked to ended up calling her a bitch when she wouldn't give him her phone number.

  5. She took that whole "don't talk to strangers" thing to heart.

  6. She's in the middle of a two-week vow of silence.

  7. You have bad breath.

  8. She's trying to remember all the lyrics to the second verse of "Intergalactic" by the Beastie Boys.

  9. This is the only "alone time" she's going to get for the next week and she's savoring it.

  10. She just left a therapy appointment where she dug into all of her mother issues and wow, is she not in the mood.

  11. She's rapidly repeating her grocery list under her breath so she doesn't forget it.

  12. She has post-traumatic stress from another encounter with a random man.

  13. You're staring at her boobs, douchebag.

  14. She's mentally practicing a super important work presentation that she has to give in an hour (and she's gonna get that promotion if it kills her, damnit!).

  15. She's plotting world domination.

  16. You called her "baby" and licked your lips as you said hello.

  17. She's feeling shy and introverted today.

  18. She's reliving the amazing sex she had this morning and doesn't want you intruding on such an intimate moment.

  19. She's waiting on a super important phone call and doesn't want to risk missing it.

  20. You're obviously angling for a phone number and she's so, so not interested.

  21. She's counting her steps to check the accuracy of her pedometer and really needs to concentrate.

  22. You look like her ex.

  23. She just got some upsetting medical news and is trying to process it.

  24. She's trying to get a piece of spinach out of her teeth and she's aaaaallllmost got it.

  25. She's having an amazing day and doesn't want one of your painfully lame pickup lines to kill her good vibe.

  26. She's on her way to an audition and practicing her monologue.

  27. You're not nearly as charming as you think you are.

  28. She just found out her girlfriend has been cheating on her.

  29. She has social anxiety and it's extremely hard for her to just be out in public, let alone engage with strangers.

  30. She's doing math problems in her head to keep her mind sharp.

  31. She just left the dentist and is trying desperately to keep her mouth closed to keep from drooling.

  32. She's an assassin tracking her next target.

  33. Your lack of boundaries and invasion of her space is making her very uncomfortable.

  34. She barely has time to see her real friends right now and doesn't have time to make another one.

  35. She's trying to manifest her best life and Oprah says manifestation requires focus.

  36. Your penchant for the term "m'lady" is deeply unsettling.

  37. She's planning out the first zero-gravity bondage scene in the erotic S&M sci-fi novel she's working on and trust me, you don't want to disturb her creative process.

  38. She's meditating.

  39. She's running really late for book club and she's in charge of bringing wine tonight.

  40. You're wearing a "This Is What A Meninist Looks Like" T-shirt.

  41. She's actually asleep right now. She sleeps with her eyes open in line at Kroger.

  42. She can't focus on anything but Orphan Black plotlines right now.

  43. You have crazy eyes, dude.

  44. Her astrologer told her not to talk to any strange men until Mercury comes out of retrograde.

  45. She pulled a muscle in her neck and it hurts to open her mouth.

  46. She's saving all her social energy for a job interview she has later today.

  47. She's breaking in her new Dr. Martens and her feet are killing her.

  48. That dumb joke you just made about the length of her dress? It really pissed her off.

  49. Believe it or not, her life is full and satisfying and exciting and lovely without you in it.

  50. She doesn't feel like talking.

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