Jody Allard

Jody Allard

Bio

Jody Allard is a former techie turned freelance writer living in Seattle. Her online work has appeared on Time, xoJane, and Offbeat Home, among others. She writes primarily about food, family, mothering, and life with a chronic illness. 

Jody Allard Articles

Who in the actual fuck has a whole raw bell pepper at Thanksgiving dinner?

5 Awful Family Members You're Sure To See On Thanksgiving –– And How To Survive

It's time to gather around the table with the family members you see only once or twice a year (for good reason) and try to avoid stabbing each other with your forks. #Blessed.

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I've Never Felt Nurtured, And Other Things I've Learned Parenting After Complex Trauma

Before I went to therapy, I married a lot of men, had a lot of children, and worked myself to the bone to achieve career success. If I wasn't happy, it was easy to blame that on my alcoholic, cheating husband or raising a tribe of kids or even working too damn much.

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Mom Whose Infant Died On His First Day Of Daycare Asks "Why?"

Amber Scorah's son Karl was three months old when she dropped him off at his first day of daycare. When she returned two and a half hours later to breastfeed him on her lunch break, he was dead.

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Oregon Militia Is Not Amused By Dildos Arriving In The Mail

Once upon a time, a band of heavily-armed men decided to take over an Oregon federal building. Because they were white, the Feds didn't shoot them in 12 seconds, and nobody even really did anything about it. (Possibly also because these intrepid defenders of our Constitution decided to seize a bird sanctuary.)

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Little Boy's Song About Mom With Breast Cancer Is The Best Thing You'll Hear Today

After eight-year-old Archer Nelson's mother was diagnosed with breast cancer, he had one thing on his mind: boobs.

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Why has Kim Davis not been fired yet?

Kim Davis Is Out Of Jail And I Want To Punch Her In The Face

Okay, I know that's not very Christian of me. Luckily, I'm an atheist. But, really, if we are being honest, who doesn't want to punch Kim Davis in the face by now?

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Target To Open Its First Store WITH A BAR

A Target spokesperson has confirmed that a Chicago neighborhood will soon be the lucky recipient of a brand spanking new Target –– complete with a BAR. That has ALCOHOL.

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Autism.

I Don't Always Feel Compassion For My Autistic Child — And I'm OK With That

For all of the touchy-feely awesomeness of the idea of "focusing on compassion," there are moments in life when it's simply not practical. One of those moments is when it takes every last bit of internal fortitude simply to survive.

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Blacks Belong At "Slower Schools": Supreme Court Justice Scalia Really Just Said That

ICYMI amongst the chorus of outrage over Donald Trump's latest round of racist comments, the Supreme Court is hearing oral arguments this week in Fisher v. the University of Texas, a landmark case challenging the use of race in college admissions –– and Justice Scalia just lost his goddamn mind.

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Kentucky Clerk Sent to Jail For Defying Order to Issue Same-Sex Marriage Licenses

To further emphasize what can only be described as a batshitcrazy level of hypocrisy, a petition has been started on change.org to ensure that Davis receives the Biblical treatment for her own "misdeeds" –– stoning. While I wouldn't go quite that far, the point is taken. Multiple other petitions have also been started to remove her from office.

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