Jody Allard

In 1997, Kenny and Bobbi McCaughey made history when they welcomed the first set of surviving septuplets to the world. Now, 18 years later, as the septuplets prepare to leave the nest, the world has only one question: "How the hell did we all get so old?"

As you've probably gathered by the explosion of pink everything, October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. And, while many people try to spread awareness with the best of intentions, there isn't anyone left on this planet who hasn't heard of breast cancer. Breast cancer patients need many things, but sharing silly Facebook statuses and engaging in other click-it-and-forget-about-it forms of awareness isn't one of them.

If you're anything like me, the only enjoyable part of shopping at Costco is the samples. It's always packed, there's nowhere to park, people push their massive fucking carts slower than molasses in January, and everything about it makes me homicidal EXCEPT for the sweet, sweet lure of the samples.

A Target spokesperson has confirmed that a Chicago neighborhood will soon be the lucky recipient of a brand spanking new Target –– complete with a BAR. That has ALCOHOL.

ICYMI, half of my home state of Washington, as well as our neighboring state of Idaho, has been or is currently on fire.

Nicole Arbour –– comedian of "Dear Fat People" fame –– is back with a new video, and this time it's NOT a complete debacle. In fact, Arbour is surprisingly on point with her "Dear Refugees" video, which takes aim at the Syrian refugee crisis.

Here's the thing, though. Seattle teachers didn't want to strike. What they wanted were reasonable class sizes, less focus on teaching to the test, and livable wages. These are fair and reasonable demands, and that is why parents throughout Seattle have rushed to the picket lines to support our teachers.

Dear Kylie,

What Paul and his sympathizers fail to recognize is that there is a crisis facing Social Security disability, but it isn't fraud.

My favorite part about summer is the ability, for three short months, to stop looking at the clock or calendar and to start enjoying the present.