Kate Ryan

Surviving the Apocalypse didn’t mean they couldn’t enjoy a little romance.

My parents got the idea they’d send me to stay at my grandparents’ house in Florida for a week. I think my mother needed a week to herself.

12:48 AM. Why would someone schedule an exorcism for the middle of a weeknight?

We all love our dogs. However, some of us take it a little too far, convincing ourselves that our dogs are actually our children. You call your dog your “baby” one day, and the next thing you know, you’re pushing him or her down the street in an expensive stroller. How did we get here? Trust me, it’s a slippery slope. Here are 12 signs you might have a dog-child.

There are some hipster things that hipsters want us to love, so we’ll join their cult. But we’re done falling for these things because we’re all unique individuals. Here are 10 things you need to avoid right now if you don’t want to be a hipster.

I saw my old babysitter at a women’s wrestling cage match.

She couldn’t imagine the water she sat in, the water that enveloped her body, wanted to be here.

A bloated mother in her polka dot one-piece gnaws on a corndog while reading the romantic pulp she picked up on her way out of the supermarket . . .

She got too high while watching The Bachelor and had a misanthropic breakdown.

Like booster engines emptied of fuel, my limbs become disposable, useless tanks as the blood rushes from them.