fat acceptance

A surge of adrenaline hits me. I want to snap a selfie. A semi-nude selfie.

We are often so focused on what we say to girls, that we forget the impact our words have on our boys. One flippant mention of my son’s “skinny” figure has turned into a source of unnecessary turmoil for him, and has lead to this difficult but important conversation about body image.

Size, like age and salary and whatever else, is just a number. Pretending numbers don’t measure things isn’t helpful. I’m 38 years old: That isn’t good or bad, but it IS different from being 18 or 50.

I saw my boobs as a way to get me into the secret world of feminine desirability, so I played them like they were my winning hand. I created an entire story about my sexuality that centered my breasts because they felt like the only normal — or maybe extraordinary — thing about my body. I think I hoped that I could use them to get some precious ween (obvi), but also to get MORE.

[CN: diets, not eating (both satirical)] So, you’ve tried every diet out there. You are fed up — and often barely fed at all. The South Beach Diet, The North Pole Diet, The Atkins Diet, The Fatkins Diet, Weight Watchers, Weight Ignorers… The list is as long as your droopy face.

I didn’t think that my disordered, fatphobic mindset could be rewired — until, one day, I realized that that very thing had happened. Somehow the new ideas had broken through!
There is still work to be done, but by re-educating myself, making a priceless network of body-positive friends, and upgrading my media influence, I am on the right path.

My favorite thing about this trip was that I spent my time in Vienna with fat feminists by my side every single day.... Occasionally, our bellies bumped into one another and then rebounded for just a second, like balloons. The familiar physics of fatness multiplied by two or three. I felt like we spoke in shorthand, the language of shared experience.

Jacob (boyfriend) lives walking distance to a See’s Candies. This means that half the week I live walking distance to a See’s Candies — which, if you're me, is a little like living next to Disneyland.