Carrie Saum

Twice a year, I embark on a one to two week cleanse. I feel invigorated, I sleep better, my libido rises, and I'm able to use it as a reset to return to eating foods that make my body feel good.

This is utter nonsense. There are no good or bad foods so let's stop moralizing food. Let's also stop moralizing money fitness and time!

Heating up a kitchen while you are doing your level best to not become human molten lava is always the goal during summer, no matter where you live. I prefer batch cooking if I can make that happen, and never, under any circumstances, do I turn on my oven. Unless I'm baking a birthday cake or maybe some hand pies.

I now interrupt your frantic turkey preparations for the following announcement: 

EAT PIZZA, INSTEAD.

I didn't have even an ounce of energy to spare to process my own feelings. Everything I had went to my son.

I know that our group of friends is special. But the specialness comes from some core values that I will share with you. I will give you fair warning: these are not for people who are interested in receiving. These eight guidelines are for people who are interested in building a community.

I also kind of feel like whatever I do eventually put in my body needs to be quality and filling and full of nutritious goodness. This is hard on mornings when it literally feels like all I can do to make toast. Sometimes I look at it, contemplate it fresh out of the toaster and briefly wonder if I really need to spread the almond butter on it. Because effort.

Summer is winding down.

The great thing is you can use basically any regular substitutions and this will still taste amazing. I literally eat this with a spoon, and because it’s egg-free, I feel no shame. Okay, I don’t feel any shame when I bust into a tub of regular cookie dough, either. I’m just trying to do my fair share to keep you from getting salmonella.

I do this thing that I'm really proud of: 

I eat leftovers.