Carrie Saum

You don’t have to do it all in order to have a fun or memorable holiday season. Just do the things that bring you life and make your soul sparkle a little.

My friends, food is getting fancier.

What’s more refreshing than a piping hot mug of coffee? Well, lots of things. How about a recipe for cold-brew pumpkin spice coffee instead?

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The truthiest truth, though, is food is expensive. It costs a pretty penny to feed yourself well, with conviction, ethical sourcing, and quality ingredients. It’s OK if you are privileged enough to be able to eat a certain way — there is NO SHAME in that. But please. be careful not to shame those who are unable to eat according to YOUR convictions.

When I have difficult life decisions or conflict with people who are close to me, I now have the working understanding of what peace truly looks like for me. It looks like freedom to be fully who I am.

The holiday season presents numerous opportunities to celebrate and be with people we love and enjoy. It's also a constant source of potential triggers, just waiting to burst to the surface. Infinite stimulation creates a perfect storm to drown all of us in the overwhelm. As fun as the holidays can be, they can be a deep well of anxiety and exhaustion. Over the last decade, I've discovered what works best for me in regards to managing the holiday deluge. So, here's what's worked for me.

I cracked the sugar crust, took a bite, and then I actually DID cry. Huge, crocodile tears because it was good and this food tasted the way the city felt. It was home.

I know that our group of friends is special. But the specialness comes from some core values that I will share with you. I will give you fair warning: these are not for people who are interested in receiving. These eight guidelines are for people who are interested in building a community.

We had no turkey, no casserole dishes heaped sweet potatoes or creamy green beans, no pies made from scratch, no beautiful table settings or nice dishes to heap our non-existent feast upon.