Gemma Hartley

Gemma Hartley

Bio

Gemma Hartley is a freelance writer with a BA in writing from The University of Nevada, Reno. She is author of FED UP: Emotional Labor, Women and The Way Forward. She lives in Reno with her husband, three young kids, an awesome dog, and a terrible cat.

Gemma Hartley Articles

Being a Supermom isn't worth losing a spouse (Image Credit: Thinkstock)

I Gave Up Being A Supermom To Be A Better Wife

When my son was a baby, I used my husband as a second set of hands. He was my co-parent, the other caretaker... I was no longer viewing him as my partner, but rather as an aide to attaining the next level of mothering. Even though my husband never called me out on my behavior, I slowly but surely hung up my need for perfection. Because if being a great mother means being a crappy wife, I don't want any part of it.

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The road to the White House is paved for women because Hillary Clinton poured the pavement herself — while all around, rocks were thrown her way.

I Hope My Daughter Looks Up To Hillary Clinton — Even Though I Won't Vote For Her

She is the type of woman I hope my daughter looks up to, a successful feminist role model if there ever was any. She is strong in the face of adversity. She does not cower when criticized. She knows that her words and actions are powerful, and is not afraid of those who would call her bossy, grating, shrill, yelling — when all she is really doing is being a leader. It is powerful for a growing girl to watch a woman like that thrive.

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Raise a glass to Friendsgiving - feasting without any sides of controversy or conspiracy theorizing.

6 Reasons Friendsgiving Beats Real Thanksgiving Every Damn Time

Raise a glass to Friendsgiving - feasting without any sides of controversy or conspiracy theorizing. Friendsgiving is the best of all feasts.

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The Emotional Cost Of Shelving Your Dreams

I am sometimes painfully envious of other (usually childless) writers who are doing the very thing I swore I would have done by now — publishing a novel.

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I wasn’t simply an accessory to misogynistic behavior — I was actively participating in it. Image: Thinkstock.

'One Of The Guys': On Cool Girls And Internalized Misogyny

I felt unique in my passion for martial arts, my affinity for Call of Duty, my go-with-the-flow attitude toward boyish adventures. I wanted to be “one of the guys,” while still retaining the distinction of my sexuality. I longed to be the quintessential cool girl — desirable yet approachable. But in retrospect, all that really amounted to internalized misogyny.

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Sure, I could probably use a few new life-hacks, but if I can figure out how to love my life in 2017, that will be more than enough.

A Better New Year's Resolution

My resolutions regularly remind me that I don’t think I am enough, just as I am. So this year, instead of focusing on habit changes, I'm more concerned with changing my perspective.

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What you really need out the gate isn’t a “mom tribe.” You simply need a tribe. Period. Image: Joni Edelman.

Why I Gave Up On Making 'Mom' Friends

Mom friends were the ones to whom you were supposed to spill all those dark parenting thoughts. I wanted that mom-magic. I knew it was out there somewhere.

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Let's all just admit that coffee is disgusting, and move on with our lives.

It's Time We Stop Lying To Ourselves About Coffee 

Your dirty brown garbage water is a scourge upon the human race, and I'm here to say it's time to call it quits. Let's all just admit that coffee is disgusting, and move on with our lives. It has no place beside delicious breakfast foods, and it is high time we banned this foul liquid from sullying the world of brunch.

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Having a successful young marriage is the exception, not the rule.

What I Want My Kids To Know About Marrying Young

My husband and I have been together for 12 years, eight of them married, four of them teenaged.

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