Gemma Hartley

Gemma Hartley

Bio

Gemma Hartley is a freelance writer with a BA in writing from The University of Nevada, Reno. She is author of FED UP: Emotional Labor, Women and The Way Forward. She lives in Reno with her husband, three young kids, an awesome dog, and a terrible cat.

Gemma Hartley Articles

Photo by Boxed Water Is Better on Unsplash

This Mother's Day Let's Stop Treating Emotional Labor Like Extra-Credit Work For Men 

...[M]en get a lot of praise for the “extra-credit work” they do in regards to domestic labor (the actual house cleaning and keeping work) and emotional labor (the invisible work that ensures the rest gets done) no matter what day of the year.

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I want them to remember love and feeling wanted, always — all of them.

My Son Wants An Only Child; His Reason Breaks My Heart

My six-year-old son got into the car after school and declared he only wanted to have one kid when he grew up.

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The lies would keep me up at night, gnawing at the place inside me where I felt my baby should be.

I Hid My Miscarriage From My Son & Pretended I Was Still Pregnant

How was I supposed to tell my son, who was already preoccupied and frightened by the idea of death, that his new little brother or sister was gone, that I'd had a miscarriage? I didn't know. So I lied.

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I’m an ambivert. And if you’ve ever felt like you don’t quite fit into the introvert or extrovert crowds, maybe you are too!

Finding Out I'm An Ambivert Totally Changed My Life

I spent most of my life assuming I was an introvert, but not a very good one. Then finding out I'm an ambivert totally changed my life!

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I had never had a problem with loving myself, until now. (Image: Thinkstock)

I Am Body Positive, Just Not When It Comes To Myself

But I was yet to face the cold, hard fact that my lack of acceptance for my own body, was really a lack of acceptance for all the bodies I had falsely embraced for so long. Could I really love someone else’s ample stomach, when I could not love my own?

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My depression is my dirty secret.

Why I Keep My Depression A Dirty Secret

I know it’s a lie when I tell myself that I’m “simply off” or “maybe I’m just having a few bad days” or “I’m in a funk” or “I must be upset about something, but I don’t know what.”

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Not giving in to the stereotype of "hysterical liberal" is a slap back at online trolls looking for a reaction.

Why I'm Choosing To Fight Fascism With Facts

Like many progressives, the early days of Trump's presidency have left me angry, exhausted, and fighting with strangers on Facebook.

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The point is, if you feel like you're sucking at the back-to-school transition, take heart. I am out here doing way way worse.

It's Only The 2nd Week Of School & I'm Already Falling Apart

Clearly, it does not take long for my over-ambition to turn me from a vision of perfection into a train wreck you can't look away from. Behold, my first week of school splendor, versus my second week of school ineptitude.

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I felt a strong need to rise to challenges, because I knew that my dad would expect nothing less from me. Image: Thinkstock.

My Dad Wouldn't Call Himself A Feminist, But I Would.

“Feminism” wasn’t a word I heard much growing up. When I did hear it, I equated it with a historical event, not a work in progress. I thought first-wave feminism was a one-and-done deal, and that all the work necessary for women’s equality had already been accomplished.

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Bad behavior is not "being" bad (Image Credit: Think Stock)

The ONE Thing We Need To Stop Saying To Our Kids

There is a chasm separating "bad behavior" from "being bad." Our kids have to learn from us that their one-time actions do not permanently define them.

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