Gemma Hartley

Gemma Hartley

Bio

Gemma Hartley is a freelance writer with a BA in writing from The University of Nevada, Reno. She is author of FED UP: Emotional Labor, Women and The Way Forward. She lives in Reno with her husband, three young kids, an awesome dog, and a terrible cat.

Gemma Hartley Articles

I didn’t realize how crucial my late teens and early twenties were for forming deep and lasting female friendships to get me through the gritty parts of life. Image: Thinkstock.

The Things I Missed Out On Because I Got Married As A Teenager

I was constantly on the defense, prepared to fight for my young love against those who thought I wasn’t ready for marriage. It pains me to say it, but in a way, they were right after all. There were things I was missing out on by marrying young, things I didn’t even realize I was missing until it was too late.

Read...
The perks of growing up include knowing what constitutes stupidity over boys.

10 Things That I've Done For Boys (That I'll NEVER Do Again)

Sometimes, I think back to all the ridiculous things I did for boys when I was younger and cringe.

Read...
Again and again I refuse to prioritize, refuse to let anything slide, at the expense of my physical and mental health.

Why Is It So Hard To Go Easy On Myself?

Again and again I refuse to prioritize, refuse to let anything slide, at the expense of my physical and mental health.

Read...
The occasional drink helped keep my stress levels low — and ultimately it contributed to a healthier pregnancy for me. Image: WeHeartIt.

Why I Drank While I Was Pregnant

I went on to drink a small glass of wine or two per week throughout my pregnancy once I got over the initial shock of it being unplanned. Once I had adjusted to the fact that I was going to bring another baby into the world, I was still overwhelmed by the stress it brought on. I had suffered from postpartum depression after the birth of my son and we had decided not to have any more children. I didn't want the risks or the horrible anxiety that came with pregnancy. Yet here I was, facing all that uncertainty again. Damn right I needed a drink.

Read...
My depression is my dirty secret.

Why I Keep My Depression A Dirty Secret

I know it’s a lie when I tell myself that I’m “simply off” or “maybe I’m just having a few bad days” or “I’m in a funk” or “I must be upset about something, but I don’t know what.”

Read...
How do you make the leap to ask out a potential friend? (Image: Unsplash/ Eli DeFaria)

5 Tips For Making Grown-Up Friends 

Making friends as a grown woman is hard. I figured out a few tips on how to set up successful one-on-one friend dates, as well as how to handle the territory of a budding platonic relationship with another woman.

Read...
It’s a wish that I could live a thousand different lives if only there were time.

Chasing The Life I Didn't Live

Starting a new year makes me look toward the future, looking at all the choices that lay ahead of me. But it also nudges me to examine my past in a very certain way. It's the time of year I always find myself thinking about the choices I didn’t make — about the life I didn't live.

Read...
image credit: Joni Edelman

I Don't Want My Daughter To Be A "Bad Eater"

I wonder because I think I'm making the same mistakes with my daughter. She hardly eats. She's very picky. I feel like food is a constant struggle between us. I also feel like it's all my fault.

Read...
Our kids define so much of our existence — shouldn't we at least take a break when we get a chance and talk about something other than them? Image: Thinkstock.

Can We Please Stop Talking About Our Kids?

I don't want motherhood to be where my life begins and ends. Sure, we can still talk about our kids, commiserate, and share in one another's parenting accomplishments — but at some point, we need to be more than mere storytellers of our children's lives.

Read...