Winona Dimeo-Ediger

The thing is, we soak in these body-judging lessons from a very young age, before we even know how damaging they are. Some of the messages are implicit, like when we see a fat girl getting made fun of on the playground (or, for many of us, when we are the fat girl getting made fun of on the playground) and learn that being fat is not just wrong, it’s a punishable offense.

5. You start feeling insecure about the distinct lack of rappers in your social circle.

Will you ever find a chair you like? Are there any good chairs left in this world? Why are so many people in your neighborhood attempting to sell “lightly used” sex chairs? What is a sex chair?

1. Only eat salad and grilled chicken. Salad and grilled chicken, as a general rule, don’t ruin lives. Salad and grilled chicken are great... sometimes. Unless you’re going to amazing restaurants all the time and ordering nothing but salad and grilled chicken — then salad is definitely ruining your life.

You deserve to be happy just as you are, and that extends to the clothes you put on in the morning. I’m so glad you’ve decided to buy some clothes that fit and make you feel fabulous and stylish. Even if it’s just a few new pieces, it’s going to make such a difference in the way you look and feel.

Now, it may seem like the NRA is comprised of emotionally stunted gun fetishists with a shriveled up copy of the second amendment where their hearts should be, but that’s simply not true. They totally cry about stuff! Not mass shootings of children, but other stuff. Just to be clear, here are 10 things worth crying #REALTEARS, according to the NRA.

I ask myself these questions every time I’m considering a purchase, and if the answer to any of them is “no,” I put it back on the rack.

But my God, have you read a celebrity gossip rag recently? They make Vogue and InStyle seem like forward-thinking beacons of body positivity and intersectional feminism.

Target’s lack of gender signage is obviously a sinful, confusing disaster. You should definitely never shop there again. But just in case you ever need to buy a gift for your kid and Wal-Mart is closed, here are some tips for how to navigate the Godless dystopia that is the new unlabeled toy section of Target:

Oh my god check out those shoes. Those are uuuuugly! They look like a lizard swallowed a horse hoof and then molted. Not cute