Rebekah Kuschmider

Oh Ted Cruz, Ted Cruz, Ted Cruz. The Senator from Texas has been working hard this campaign season to shore up his conservative bona fides, including a memoir that talks about some of his more notable cases from when he was Solicitor General for Texas. But he skips a really interesting — nay — prurient case involving the legality of selling and using sex toys. Mother Jones ran a detailed analysis of it today and woo boy, is the internet going nuts!

Given the current gulf between the two candidates in terms of primaries and delegates won, it’s pretty safe to say that we’re looking at a Trump nomination.

This isn’t your old-school, gas-station-bathroom condom dispenser, either. It's called a Wellness To Go station that sells condoms, Plan B Emergency Contraception, pregnancy tests, tampons and pads, and even over-the-counter painkillers like Advil and Tylenol.

The body and face we have today is such a tenuous thing. The longer I live, the more strongly aware I am that there are no promises of health or wholeness. Beauty is fleeting, and does it matter anyway if your body suddenly ceases to work the way it "should"? Would I regret the days I spent peering at imperfections if suddenly my sight were gone?

Maybe grown-ups do their best physical work in a spin class with an instructor telling us when to stand up and when to sit down, but kids get enough of that kind of structure in the classroom. What they really need is more time to do their own thing.

We will not be having our first woman president and I, for one, must grieve. A dream deferred.

Paul Ryan and 216 other Republican representatives (but no Democrats, FYI) voted to pass the American Health Care Act (AHCA), which is an attempt to unmake everything that the Affordable Act (Obamacare, if you’re a nasty woman or bad hombre) did to make health insurance more accessible, more comprehensive, and less expensive.

Allegedly, Botox in the scrotum can relax the scrotal sack and allow the balls to drop more, making them look more prominent. It also makes the scrotum less wrinkly. The guy in the video was pleased with the results and said his girlfriend was pleased as well. Same with the guy in Cosmo. So, that’s two happy customers who were willing to share their experience with the world wide web.

The revolution will be tweeted. By scientists.

I’m going to start today’s Rav’s Radar with two words: Don’t Panic.