Rebekah Kuschmider

There is now a sex toy called the Sqweel that looks like a cross between an Epilady and something you would find at a craft store, maybe in the rubber stamp section. It’s supposed to look like a wheel of tongues, but honestly? I think it could also be used to paint borders on decorative plates or something.

If you are a dog or a cat and have sensitive hearing and a limited understanding of patriotism, fireworks seem like an assault. For all your dog knows, the world is actually ending in a blaze of colorful sparkles and loud explosions.

Everyone has that one friend who shows up uninvited, drinks all the beer, then passes out and won’t leave until someone threatens to call the cops. Someone like that crashed a camping trip in Baker Lake, WA recently and made a real spectacle of himself.

Nike is getting ready to debut a line of sport hijabs for Muslim athletes.

The news cycle feels like a roller coaster ride these days. We’re all sitting in this little car, plunging up and down without any control over anything. But at least we have Dan Rather along for the ride.

We salute you, fidget spinner dog. You are a good boy.

Ever feel sick of it all? Want to run away from home?

When I need a moment to feel better about everything around me, I type “dogs” into the search field of my news app and wait for the magic to happen. Dogs always come through, and today is no different.

We already know that white supremacists made their appearance by torchlight, guns in plain sight, so we would all see, unmistakably, that racist filth is here and they are not afraid to show their faces. They have showed us how far they are willing to go. But stay strong and vigilant. We must be the better angels of America.

You know how humans sometimes put out in order to pay their rent? Well, penguins put out to get building materials for their nests.