Rebekah Kuschmider

Is it because whoopee is more fun when there’s less chance that your orgasm will result in a diaper blow-out 40 weeks later?

ERMEHGERD! HERRY PERTTER!!!!!!!!!!

Yes. That’s right. Texas passed laws to allegedly make abortion safer when abortion is already nearly perfectly safe. Our good friend Justice Breyer honed in on this yesterday, when he asked the lawyer defending the law how often Texas patients are transferred from abortion provider to hospital.

Follow these tips and you will look well-rested, you will not have camel toe, your underwire won’t poke you in the armpit, your hair will smell nice, your knuckles might not crack in the cold weather, and you will have enough money leftover for icing and sprinkles for the next absurd elementary school party. Huzzah!

Queen Elsa isn't the only one with magic hands anymore! Nine-year-old Karissa Mitchell was born missing part of her right hand and arm. And while she wasn’t born with a love of the movie Frozen, she certainly has plenty of that too!

There’s been good news on the unintended pregnancy rate lately, what with Guttmacher Institute suggesting that the rise of IUDs is leading to a decline in unintended pregnancies. But the news, it turns out, isn’t all good.

The Daily Mail did the hard work of tracking down prices for the various products Kylie has on her face — and ears — and the retail cost of using them would be $500.

When I saw the trending hashtag #DemocraticWhores, I got really excited, thinking maybe Democrats were all strutting around today in those sensational boots Julia Roberts wore way back in Pretty Woman. Nancy Pelosi could rock those boots, don’t you think?

We all spoil our pets, right? I’m certainly guilty of it. My dog’s favorite things are bully sticks, which are literally dried bull penises. They cost about $1 a pop and that’s kind of splurge for an animal who can amuse herself by licking her own butt.

There’s a new drug hitting the hottest clubs in Europe, and I suspect it’ll soon cross the pond to America. Or maybe it’s already here — in your cabinet, desk drawer, or the end-caps at your grocery store.