Rebekah Kuschmider

There’s another entrepreneur out there who wants to teach us to masturbate better, too. And they’re ready to send smart-tech into our vaginas to make it happen.

Pregnancy is 40 weeks along. Everyone knows that. Except we’re finding out that maybe it isn’t 40 weeks. It might only be 38 weeks. Or 43 weeks. Or maybe 42 weeks. You see, new research has find out out that length of pregnancy varies and due dates are LIES, ALL LIES.

So, you’re on your way to work. You’re dragging and want a little pick-me-up before you hit the office.

Erin O'Flaherty, Miss Missouri, is the first openly gay Miss America contestant.

I’ve never read the Quran or attended a Mosque, but I’m pretty certain that if anyone had the chance to speak directly with the god Allah or the Prophet Muhammad, they would not be saying “Bitches be crazy, yo. Keep them bitches down.”

In the latest chapter of “Celebrities Drink What Now?,” Glamour magazine is reporting that Kourtney Kardashian starts her day with a teaspoon of melted ghee.

There is literally zero precedent for foreign influence on elections in the US — at least to this degree — and no one seems to know what to do with the information.

The big additions are in the food category, where we’ll see the much-longed-for bacon finally appear, along with clinking champagne glasses and a potato. Sounds like a meal to me!

“You know, in my next life, when I come back, I want to be someone in the WTA because they ride on the coattails of the men. They don't make any decisions, and they are lucky. They are very, very lucky. If I was a lady player, I'd go down every night on my knees and thank God that Roger Federer and Rafa Nadal were born because they have carried this sport. They really have.”

My god, that is IT! The GOP has finally unveiled their crack public health analysis and they are going after the root of all health problems!