Rebekah Kuschmider

So, who is more actively feminist this week? Ivanka, who can’t articulate a White House policy for bettering the lives of women? Or Beyoncé, who is shelling out big bucks to better the lives of women?

No word on whether Hill-dawg herself is a fan of crullers or jelly-filled.

After much deliberation, the Food Police have determined that caffeine, in moderation, is still not bad for people. You are free to drink 400 mg of caffeine a day— the equivalent of 36 ounces of regular coffee — and nothing bad will happen to you.

This event and the movement it’s spawning has the potential to kick some serious ass.

I want to know how much yoga a person would have to do to be able to vote with their vagina. And kegels. Sooooo many kegels.

Now, if you need me, I’m going to see if I can rig something similar for my dog so she can tell me if she’s barking at real danger or just a cheeky squirrel.

No mention is made of what happens should a teen be estranged from one parent, should a teen be in a single-parent family, if there are geographic distances between a teen and a parent, and did I mention that abortions are nobody’s beeswax? Yeah.

Follow these tips and you will look well-rested, you will not have camel toe, your underwire won’t poke you in the armpit, your hair will smell nice, your knuckles might not crack in the cold weather, and you will have enough money leftover for icing and sprinkles for the next absurd elementary school party. Huzzah!

Great news Laydeez! Someone has finally decided to hone in on the scourge of rectangle shaped phones that have been plaguing us all! After all, everyone knows women can’t use rectangles!

Persistent women have made America greater, stronger, and just more than the Founding Fathers could have envisioned. Persistent women are holding up half the American sky and NO ONE should question our right to do so.