Relationships

She’s made all the mistakes, so you don’t have to…Ask Erin is a weekly advice column, in which Erin answers your burning questions about anything at all.

Being a "nice guy" has become an excuse for unacceptable behavior in romantic relationships. Matt says enough is enough. It's time for honesty to take the place of kindness with ulterior motives.

She’s made all the mistakes, so you don’t have to…Ask Erin is a weekly advice column, in which Erin answers your burning questions about anything at all.

Trying to be dominant feels like acting for me. This isn’t to say there is no acting during scenes when I’m bottoming, but there’s a reason why I preferred working backstage when I did theatre in college—I don’t like pretending to be something I’m really not. It isn’t comfortable. It doesn’t feel natural.

How embarrassing is this story, and is the value in it (be it entertainment, educational, or both) enough that the benefit in sharing it outweighs how mortifying it is?

Vaginal orgasms are real. But if you want to climax quick? Someone needs to be stimulating the clit with something — usually fingers or a vibrator. Yes, it may mean a little extra work. But a dedicated dude will make it happen.

So, I got an email from my brother yesterday telling me that he’s not coming to the wedding. “I want to be there,” he writes, “I really do, but the idea of being consigned to [our mother and her boyfriend’s] care for the duration of the trip is driving me mad. You know, the whole lack of autonomy and being on someone else's time and all that.”

It took me a long time to understand consent. I knew that forcing sex on someone was rape. I knew that one in five women would be raped in their lifetime. I knew that the majority of rape victims knew their attacker. But beyond that, my understanding got cloudy.