Winona Dimeo-Ediger

Clean eating is so passe, you guys. It’s time to get on board the newest trend: dirty eating!

Suffering from a severe case of the frumps? Not anymore.

Here are ten things I’ve been really, truly, actually nostalgic for lately, amidst the wild, terrifying ride that is 2017.

Practically speaking, if you want to try a fashion trend that you’re not initially comfortable with, approach it the same way you would an awkward convo with your mom or a spontaneous skinny dip in a freezing lake: ease in.

When it comes to hiring people, be sure to steer clear of anyone who has a customer service background and glowing recommendations. The last thing you want is a perky, friendly face to greet your customers. So predictable!

Make a u-turn into the darkest recesses of your psyche. Wonder about your life purpose: Were you put on earth to stare at computer screens and pay bills and die? Cringe while imagining what your idealistic college self would think of you now. Conclude that your life lacks creativity and meaning and simple joys.

Half the fun (or maybe more than half? Maybe all the fun, actually) of going to the gym is getting decked out in cute workout clothes.

I ask myself these questions every time I’m considering a purchase, and if the answer to any of them is “no,” I put it back on the rack.

I call this happiness by proxy

12. Was someone just like, “I have a great idea: let’s shave part of a goat and then kind of ball up the hair and glue a pin on the back and call it a goat hair brooch”?