Winona Dimeo-Ediger

I’ve always hated shopping for dresses in general (I’m seriously supposed to track down one garment that fits properly on my chest, waist, arms, and hips simultaneously?), and finding the right thing to wear to a wedding is always tricky (do they really mean casual?).

When you’re shopping for shoes for a fancy event, it’s easy to assume that a super high heel is required for a shoe to feel dressed up enough, but that’s not necessarily the case. I’m happy to report that “sensible shoes” and “cute shoes” are not mutually exclusive terms.

Guys, let's review some of the reasons that woman you've never met might not feel like chatting, shall we?

Clothes can be altered. Clothes can be sold. Clothes can be swapped with friends. In the meantime, you have to get dressed every day, and you might as well love the clothes you have right now.

3. When you can’t see the end point, just keep going. About halfway into my blanket, I fell into this weird crocheting vortex where no matter how many new stitches I made, my blanket always looked exactly the same size. It felt like I was crocheting into a void. I got super frustrated and almost gave up multiple times, but instead, I just kept stitching.

If you’re at an amazing restaurant, eat the amazing food there! Enjoy it! Don’t limit yourself to one bite of expensive entree because you frantically forced down a pound of undressed salad before the bread basket showed up. Eat salad for its own sake. Eat it because you want to eat it, not because you’re trying NOT to eat something else.

When you’re helping people zip up dresses and watching their reactions to certain items of clothing, you start noticing patterns. Here are four of the phrases I hear most often in the dressing room, and how I wish — oh, how I wish! — I could respond.

Including: public transit inversion pose and heart-opening "shut up, mom" pose.

When it comes to hiring people, be sure to steer clear of anyone who has a customer service background and glowing recommendations. The last thing you want is a perky, friendly face to greet your customers. So predictable!

At any given moment 43% of Portland residents are chained to something in protest. The other 57% are already in jail for chaining themselves to other things.